Short Term Hiatus

Hey

I'm not sure if I mentioned this in a previous post, but I'm guessing not. We moved house recently and have been having trouble getting internet. At the moment, we're using a dongle (? is that what their called? weird name, haha!) with 2 gigabyte on it, which is not a lot, when you consider the kinds of things my family does on the pinternet. I'm a big fan of pinterest and can spend hours on a time on it, so you can imagine how much internet space THAT uses.

So anyway, we only have internet access from one computer, and I'm somewhat secretive about my blogs. I'm 22, but my family does not approve a lot of the things I share. The fact that I have a diagnosis of Bipolar II does not help, they assume that if I do something they disagree with, its because of my ''illness.'' I don't buy into that at all, I'm my own person with my own thoughts, preferences, ideas etc. I don't like everything I do being blamed on this one thing. I also dislike being treated like a 15 year old when everyone seems to post much worse things on their Facebook these days.

Being me, I still haven't made my actual point. We have had guests for the last few days, and since we only have one computer, I can only write from the lounge, where people are constantly walking in and out of. My dad doesn't have a problem with my blogs, but my mum and sisters do. The kinds of things I wrote when I was younger was a lot more personal because of the kind of problems I was having, and I must have left the browser open a few times, because they knew exactly what was going on. More recently, my sister has been reading some of my blogs and enjoying them, but when she comes across something she disagrees with or finds newsworthy in some way, she goes straight to my parents. Its not nice being tattled on when you're in your 20's.

I don't want any of these blogs to be a source of argument in my family. I'm actually hoping that some day I can share these with my family, friends, work mates, school friends etc, without worrying that I have written something that I would come to regret. That time has not come yet. I guess I need to gain some sort of credibility first.

In the past, I have used my blogs to sling dirt at people I'm angry with (not necessarily naming names or anything) or to talk about controversial things. I don't think that's a good way to make a name for yourself online, so I'm going to try not to talk about anything negative on here, unless it can help someone in some way. I could talk about people I know on here, but the only person I can really represent is myself, so I'll let others tell their own stories, if and when they feel the need. As a result, my blogs may seem self centered, but its more a case of not wanting to step on any toes. I have a reputation for being a negative person, complaining a lot, being somewhat of a perfectionist and being irritable so I'm going to try and go in a different direction with this.

If you don't like this whole ''me me me'' business, you probably won't enjoy reading this blog. I apologize for that. I wish I could share more, but I really need others permission first. With this new insight, I cringe reading auto biographies, because the way some of the authors describe people in their lives is sometimes so awful and personal- maybe those people are anonymous to a stranger reading a book, but to anyone picking up a book to support a local figure/friend/classmate/workmate etc, you can quickly work out who the real people is. I don't think its worth hurting other people to share your story.

So in conclusion, I probably won't be writing in this blog regularly for a few days. We are supposed to be getting internet on Wednesday or Thursday, so if that works out, I can blog from the comfort of my bedroom and with privacy (yay!). Until then, anything I blog will have to be done when everyone else is taking a nap.