Make Over to the Extreme

My appearance has changed a lot in the past year. I wouldn't have realised it, hadn't I committed myself to taking a photo a day since I got my last computer. I have lost weight, gained weight, experimented with my make-up, had really long hair, really short hair, a fringe, no fringe, blonde hair, brown hair, and now, nearly black hair. To be honest, its slightly ridiculous.

Having my picture taken everyday, made me realise how few clothes I have (I had to wear them over and over) but how different I managed to make myself look every day. That wasn't done on purpose either.

Anyway, I was freaking out a bit because I am young. I want to live, do exciting things, have interesting hair, nice clothes, yada yada. These things come at a price though, and as much as I love shopping and spending money, I would like to have security for the future.

I got my hair dyed ash blonde at the start of the year. I loved it and it looked great, but the regrowth came quickly and I couldn't afford nor convince my parents to get it maintained. Six months after my original appointment, and four and a half months of bad hair, I tried to go back to my natural hair colour and unintentionally ended up with a whole new look. I don't look like ''me.'' I look way older, and I reckon the new hair is two or three shades darker than my actual hair. The hairdresser thinks it will match the future regrowth, so *fingers crossed*.

Here are some pictures of how my hair and personal look has changed in the last year:

 


























And in the past few days...:

Thoughts/Insights I have thought of/stolen from others today

If I'm tithing and earning a small-average income, I should be able to buy things second hand, because 10% of my income to charity/church is a lot, and that money is helping others. A lot of the things at charity stores end up being thrown away. As long as you donate things when you no longer need them.

Don't buy new things until you have used everything you've got, unless there is a reason to stock up, such as extra food for an emergency. This means, if you have 10 books on your bookshelf that you haven't read and made the most of yet, don't go out and buy another book!

Don't desire things that are available to you. Make the most of the things that you are.

Instead of complaining about things that you don't like/should be fixed, come up with a list of problems and how they can be fixed instead of whining about them.

Base meals around vegetables.

Make decisions based on the long term, not on short term pleasure.

Weight things out from every angle before making decisions such as whether to eat a chocolate bar, whether to sleep in, whether to start dating or whether to get a pet. If you can think of a reason to say no, you probably shouldn't!

Don't pin anything new on pinterest until you have sorted out your current pins. Don't pin something in the future until you have investigated it properly.

Dream big, live small.

Take advantage of the opportunities that are available to you instead of trying to do big, expensive things that are near impossible.

Don't blame anyone for bad things in your life, treat it as a learning experience, see how you can become a better person and were you were at fault. We can't control others, or circumstances but we can control ourselves.

My Goals for July 2012

Wow, the month is disappearing on us! I can't believe we're twelve days in already, craziness!

I didn't realize this until recently, but I am a total control freak. The problem with goals and timelines, is that you often have to rely on other people or circumstances for things to happen. You are never really completely in control of your life. To some people, this might sound like a loser mentality, but I've learnt that unless you are absolutely determined for something to happen, and you want it no matter what the consequences are, its easier and more rewarding to go with the flow. We can make all the plans we want, but life finds a way of getting in the way.

If you had asked me what I would be doing five years ago, I would have said that I was doing a one year childcare course, getting shipped off to the USA for two years to nanny and explore the destination of my dreams then settling back in New Zealand to go to University and train as a primary school teacher (?).
Instead, I got five months into my childcare course, found out that I was no longer eligible to nanny to a better paying family with the course I was doing, dropped out and moved to England! Due to chronic illness, I haven't worked or studied since then, and I don't know when those things will happen for me. Around me, friends are graduating, continuing into masters programs, getting their first real jobs and getting engaged- those things were always going to happen, but my life ended up being a little less predictable than I had expected.

What would I like in the next five years?
-To get married
-To finish University
-Be well established and respected in my church
-Get paid to take photos
-Figure out what my darn ennegram type and wings are
-Have some idea of what I'm doing with my life.
-Be better travelled than I am now
-Have a Border Collie called Jess
-Know GOD's plan for me
-Be slim and fit

Those are some things I would like, but they certainly aren't expectations. I don't have a solid plan for right now. I've found that planning things for a year in advance is a total disaster for me. I need to focus on every day, week and month first and build the little goals into bigger ones.

My expectations for the next five years?
-Put on even more weight
-Develop a deep hatred for trains (you would understand if you followed me on Facebook!)
-Read lots of books
-Go back to using a windows based computer, I can't believe how frustrating Apple is!
-Decide real pets are too expensive and adopt a rock instead
-Know God a little better
-Have even more embarrassing experiences with men
-Start babysitting again, because no one else wants to give me a job

Ok, so realistically, I don't have any real expectations. I have no idea what the future holds for me, at the moment things look really bleak. I don't know if I should join some work program overseas, become a nun or start University so instead, I do nothing. The future scares me. I can deal with tomorrow or the next week or so.

So anywaaaayyy... (I told you I was long winded... you only have yourself to blame!)

My goals for July 2012
(x) Contact recommended work agencies
(x) Take 43 Things Personality Quiz
(x) Create New and Private photo bucket account
(x) Sign up for Animates membership (NZ pet shop)
() Make more notes on the road code
() Get job
() Print off directions to common destinations where I live off google maps (I just got a car, woo!)
() Sort photos
() Upload photos to photobucket and snapfish
() Start using flickr everyday
() Take photos everyday
() Clean up computer
(x) Start using blogs again
(x) Sort wardrobe space
() Back up all photos and old files up until July 2012 onto a cd
() Empty computer
() Read the last few Anne of Green Gables books
() Go through Giveways and Double Roundabouts with someone
() Find DIY mirrored vanity table with lights around edges
(x) Memorise new phone number and address
() Get down to 106 kilos
() Go bowling
(x) Buy work clothes (I have one set)
(x) Get hair cut and dyed
() Take photos of house
() Delete my tumblr and twitter accounts

A lot of these goals have been impossible because of lack of time with people, lack of funds and lack of internet. Oh and lack of self control. Why must I love fatty foods and chocolate so much?

Or I'm like, yeah, I could do that, but I don't feel like getting off my butt and putting some effort into something or asking someone for a favour. I am probably one of the most laziest people you could ever meet. At least I have a rich fantasy life. I just wish it existed outside of my head and imagination.